A Frigid Breath

That empty chasm awakes
Aware; suddenly; now forever deprived
Spoiled, every nerve tremors and shakes
As a kinky icy wave chokes and gratifies

We grow through, with, and for change
Visions blown on odd winds open wide our eyes
And to those whose norm is warm, however strange
A frigid breath most gratifies

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One Response to “A Frigid Breath”

  1. westleyd Says:

    Duncan I just want to start by saying that this poem took me a couple times through to even start to understand what you are talking about. It seems to me that, when you wrote this, you were confused and you were trying to figure some things out. I think that the chasm symbolizes the inner struggles between you and the demons inside of you. Almost like the icy wave is the death that the demons were wishing for and now the cold has come over the body they were infested in. The last line in the first stanza is wonderful to me. Like the wave chokes the demons because they are freezing when they are accustomed to being in hell, while at the same time gratifies because their goal as been reached. I really like the third line in the second stanza as well. The alliteration that you used with “norm is warm” really caught my attention and drew my interest to the line. It is very interesting to me that you state that being warm is strange. This line reinforces my interpretation because the demons would have normally been warm, being in hell. And the frigid breath means that they have brought the death to the body that they were attacking, because of this, the cold is gratifying to them. I really enjoyed reading this, and I hope that you continue to write after high school because I think that you have great potential. 246 words

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